Rock~Paper~Scissors

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Official Rules

ROCK breaks SCISSORS

SCISSORS cut PAPER

PAPER covers ROCK

No Dynamite (1)


An Overview of the Game

Introduction

Long played as a children's pastime, or as an odd-man-out selection process (e.g., who gets that last piece of cake), the time-honored game of Rock-Paper-Scissors has finally made the leap into the technological age, meshing well with the state-of-the-art computational discoveries of the past few years to emerge as the pre-eminent challenge between virtual foes.  Once a harmless encounter, R~P~S has evolved into a hybrid challenge requiring the spatial and positional awareness of a chessmaster, the strategic and mathematical savvy of a high-stakes stockbroker, and the fortitude and bravado of a professional wrestler.  Do you have what it takes?  We know you do.  This is serious.



Your Opponent

It begins with your selection of an opponent.  Choose carefully.  It is so easy for the neophyte to get out of his depth early on, and thus have the germ of his ability quashed by a seasoned veteran.  Don't go after the big guys yet.  Challenge a friend or someone on the rankings board with a not-so-great score.

You can call someone out either by nickname (as shown on the rankings page) or by email address (which must be legit and without error).  Type carefully, steadily, and with intent.  This is serious.


Your Nickname

This is the name by which you'll be know in the R~P~S Hall of Fame, should your splash into the R~P~S ring be a big one.  Your nickname is tied to the email address from which you send your challenge.   It can be anything so long as it doesn't contain the "@" symbol (which is used in email addresses).

Playing without a name is tantamount to cowardice and is not allowed.  Anonymity in a contact sport like this is like not keeping score.   And if you're not keeping score, you're just practicing.   Practice on your own time.   This is serious.


The Challenge Throw

Volumes have been devoted to the strategies involved in the decision on what to throw.   Yes, on the surface it appears easy: rock, paper, or scissors.  It doesn't seem nearly as difficult as mastering Texas Holdem rules or any complicated strategy board game like chess.  But there are only so many ways that a chess game can open, as well.   The Chess Grand Master maintains in his memory the various arrays of conventional openings, together with their merits and pitfalls.   The successful R~P~S Grand Master requires not only this phenomenal memory, but must have the ability to combine it dynamically with the psychological profile of his opponent, with finesse, misdirection, and chicanery where and when required.  It takes a lifetime to master, but you can possibly cut that time in half by checking out the Strategy Corner.


The Response Throw

Once again, the uninitiated would simply list: rock, paper, scissors.  But if the original throw is itself a Gordian Knot of strategy, the response throw is that same Knot dipped in Elmer's glue.   All that entered into the original throw combines with an added layer of complexity to generate a set of equations in the seasoned player's mind that would require differential calculus to put to paper properly.  The true master can not even describe the immense computational power that goes into his response throw.  You either have it or you don't.  It's probably a Zen thing.


Messages

Ahhhhhh, now the full potential of the game comes to fruition.  What would be an R~P~S deathmatch without the necessary taunts, gibes, and insults?  Can you pysch your opponent into throwing what you want?  Can you leave him no psychological alternative but to fall into your trap?  Can you narrow the odds by wordplay?   These mindgames are so easily inflicted on the amateur player, but when applied to the veteran, the layers of subterfuge build to unfathomable proportions.  Are you sure you are throwing what you think he thinks you're sure he'd throw in your situation if he were in the same position you were after that last throw?  Or is that just what he wants you to think?

Some strategies take full advantage of this characteristic of the R~P~S game.  You have been warned.


The Resolution

The game server, a series of highly optimized algorithms running on a distributed array of parallel processors, determines the result of both throws.   The full power of the Internet is harnessed during this process, for there is no room for error. After the numbers are crunched and the smoke clears, the game server delivers the results to both players and updates their rankings.


Conclusion

Join us in our fun.   Risk the depths of despair, depression, and psychosis.   If you are not broken by the experience, perhaps you may be one of the few to join in the vaunted High Winners Circle and be invited to world-class, winner-take-all tourneys.   To the victors go the spoils of the war, the accolades of the masses, the adulation of the opposite sex.   To the vanquished, death and ignominy (*sob*).


Other Fun Games Online

If you enjoy playing games online you may be interested to learn that online casino sites have become increasingly popular over the past few years.  Many online casinos provide full suites of over 400 different games, including online slots, blackjack, video poker, and other fun and exciting games.   If you haven't yet given online casino gaming a try, give it a shot!

Note (1):   Throwing dynamite, either within the context of this game or outside it, is an extremely serious and dangerous proposition, and is thus, understandably, forbidden.


R~P~S   "This is serious."
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